happy new year

Well I can honestly say I am so excited for a new year. This year was full of sadness, hurt, loss, and it seems like a lot of other horrible things. I pray for a great 2009.
We were invited over to Ron and Rachael's for New Years I am making a taco dip. I know I won't make it till midnight but maybe I will really try this year. If it will help bring a better year I will do anything. I pray for happiness to all sad people, I pray for financial relief for people who need it, I pray for food for the hungry, I pray for friendship and companionship for the lonely.
I sincerely hope that this year brings joy to all. Peace to those who are in need. I pray for the families who have had losses of loved ones as I have. I pray for healing for them.
That is about alls I have to say this time so again, Happy New Year to all....

happy holidays..

Well I had to bring Hannah into the specialist in Hibbing today for her ears. There is no infection which I new, but there is still fluid.. uggh. So of course they say tubes again. I expressed my frustrations to the poor lady and she said that she would recommend a ct scan and an allergy test. So we completed the allergy test after a couple tubes of blood and Hannah's anxiety was through the roof, and Hannah looks at me and says I am not getting a ct scan today. I explained it doesn't hurt at all and she just crumbled. "No Mom, I just can't do it." As I sat there and thought about it I decided to call Clint. I asked him what he thought about it and he said well maybe we should wait to get the allergy results before we spend more money on a ct scan if the allergy test comes back possitive. Well isn't he the smartest man alive I thought. So Hannah was relieved and the Doctor was fine with that. Hannah has had 3 sets of tubes in her ears and they never have worked... URGHHHH. Poor thing. But with just fluid behind the ear drum it can cause hearing loss. So it is a Big concern. She has passed her hearign test so far. Thank the Lord for that.

So other then that, tommorrow is Christmas Eve. I am praying that Lesley gets through this tough time without her little baby girl. I pray for Jeannie to have a safe trip back. I hope everyone has a safe Holiday.

merry christmas too all

Merry Christmas too all. Well another year is almost over and I think I am ready to start another. I hope that it is better then this year. There has been alot of broken hearts this year. My kids are really excited for the Holidays. I am struggling, as I do every year. It is very hard to enjoy Christmas when one side of the family doesn't get along.. I just don't understand. I talked to Tim and Lynne last night and wished them a Merry Christmas and thanked them for the card that they sent us. I hope that the new year brings open minds and hearts to all this new year. I hope people remember the meaning of Christmas. I pray everyone has a safe holiday season. I pray for Lesley to make it through these trying times without Gretta. I pray for Bill and the family to be strong without Sally. I now I need praying because it really is very tough. I pray that my family is safe and that my children and watched over by the Lord to protect them in this new year as they are getting to the age of trying times. Peer Pressure and all that other good stuff kids get to go through. I pray for everyone financial being through this recession we are going through. I hope everyone has a Very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. God Bless you all.

making it through another day.

Sally's service was Saturday in Kerville, I guess the weather was perfect and everything turned out beautifully. I am sure Bill had the best of the best for the love of his life. I talked to him last night. He sounded very confused still, I tried to comfort him as much as I could but then I told his, "Honestly Bill, if I new how to make you feel better I would do anything for you and myself cause I am really struggeling too. I told him that some days are better then others. I hear from alot of people that sometimes it gets better and sometimes it gets harder and harder. I am worried for him when everyone leaves and he is by himself. He is such a wonderful, kind and grateful man. I now why Sally loved him so much.
He told me alot of things last night that just made me feel good. He said I was Sally's favorite and that when they got back to Kerrville that she showed everyone our picture together. It is nice to know someone likes you as much as you like them. I will always love her, I will never forget about her, I will talk to her in my prayers every night before I fall asleep. Along with Grandma Mayme, Grandpa and Grandma Broberg, my aunt Glady's and Gretta, and Jim and everyone else who has crossed my life and has gone to be with out Savior.
Christmas is around the corner and we all need to remember what Christmas is all about and enjoy our time with the people we love and make the best out of all situations. I hope everyone a safe and happy holiday and I would like to remind everyone to be kind and considerate to others. My goal in life is to leave a good impression I want people to remember me as a kind and fun and loving person.... till next time. God Bless

WHAT NEXT???

Well I am not even sure where to start on this today. I know it has been awhile and I need to let some of my thoughts out. I lost another love in my life.. When is this tragedy going to end. On my way into work today I really struggled to fight back all the emotion that I am feeling. I lay in bed and I pray to god for at least a constant 4 hours to try and find some answers as to all of this tragedy... I lost Clint's Aunt Sally on Nov 25Th. She was so awesome. We became such good friends. In my eyes best friends. She came home for grandpa Broberg's funeral and we got even closer. We got grandma ready together to see her bond with her mom that has had dementia for years to watch her put her moms make up on and talk to her was so sweet. How Sally confided to me about things that had happened in her life as a child and as adult. Man she had some very tough times. She was so beautiful her smile was radiant. Her laugh was addicting. Her stories were entertaining. I can say that she was part of my family and that I really think we were as close as a mother and daughter. We would talk on the phone for hours, we would get our frustrations out we would laugh together and much better then all that we would learn more and more about each other every time we talked. I knew she was struggling when she finally reached home in Kerrville, her pain was really bad from traveling, she suffered from fibromalgia. Then I got the phone call that Grandma past away. I called her right away and she answered the phone "Hi there darlink", I new at that moment she didn't know yet. She cried so hard. She said the same thing to me when her dad died "that was my daddy", now "that was my mommy"... I could hear her sadness so much over the phone I wanted to reach in the phone and hold her. She couldn't make it home for her moms funeral, expense wise and also because of her pain. She hide her pain so well to everyone except her husband Bill he new more then anyone could ever imagine. I had talked to her last Saturday and she was crying really hard and she said that she was in alot of pain and that she really wanted Clint and his dad to talk. She was more stern then ever. I asked her if she new something that I should know? She said yes. I asked her if she had talked to Clint's dad she said yes. I said is there something wrong. She said he is sick and so is Lynne. I couldn't believe what she was saying. I can not make my husband do something that he doesn't feel he should do. Clint and his father have not talked for over 2 years. Now that I look back on that conversation I think she was telling me that they were sick but really she was.. I wish that she would of told me that instead. I think she was getting close to telling me that she wanted her life to be over but now I will never know, because she took her life. She took her life away from me, my kids who grew to love her, my husband who grew to love his auntie more then ever and everyone else that loved her. Is this better for her, I will never know.

I lay in bed night after night and I pray I ask the lord to hold my grandma Mayme, Gretta, grandpa and grandma Broberg and now my auntie Sally and my great aunt Gladys. May they have all met in the Lords house and have met each other. They all have something in common they new me...... And I loved them all.

happy deer hunting

Well in beautiful Northern Minnesota this is an exciting time of year. My husband and I process deer during deer season. We love to see the excited deer hunters come in with there big buck or maybe little does. Looks like this year there has been luck on the little side. We have processed about 13 deer as of last night. A slower pace then what we like to see. I enjoy spending the time with my husband, I like to listen to him sing in the garage some good old country songs on the radio. I enjoy listening to him figure out why and when we will get more deer. His way of logic's are so humorous to me, he said yesterday to me after a man picked up his deer and we listened to the man brag about how he likes our cutting so much. Clint's response, " You know guys like that you'd, think they would go and brag to others about us and how good of a job we do, but they don't because they don't want us to get busier where we wouldn't be able to take in there deer." It made sense to me and I agreed. My husband takes pride in everything he does even if he does nothing he still thinks he is the best at it and most of the time he is. To see him happy and singing and praising himself was self rewarding to me yesterday.
The kids are getting to the age where they want to be involved Nick is so impatient to learn how to skin a deer. Clint explained that he has to watch him do it a couple of times before he can do it on his own. He just gets mad and says mom why does dad do that he knows I know how. I try to explain that it is dangerous and dad doesn't want you to get hurt. Shelley thinks she should miss school so she can be home to answer the phones and help dad wrap when I am at work. Oh yeah and even if I am there she still should get paid because dad said that it is her job this year. It is great to see the kids excited about it. But last night I explained where the money goes that we make off it "Christmas". They all understood. I think that made them more excited to get more deer because I told them that if we don't do good it is going to be a tight Christmas.
I am getting really excited for the holidays. Yesterday I bought some new candles and it smelt so Christmasy in my house. I enjoy the holiday times, this year is going to be a very tight financial crunch for Christmas. But all we need is family and friends and lots of memories to share.
Work is still very slow. I pray that this financial crisis this world is in will end or we just all go broke. I am tired of wondering what is going to happen. I am tired of hearing how bad things really are. We all feel it in some way up north but I really truly think we all adjust better to it. Our way of life maybe simpler. I am not sure I would like a response if anyone has one on that. Well God Bless everyone.

another day

Yesturday I took half a day off and got boxes for deer processing and went home and cleaned the house. Nick and Clint went out bird hunting, Clint let Nick miss a day so they could spend time together. I went down to switch a load of laundry and realized that I had washed Rachael's bathroom rugs for her so I jumped in my car and brought those over to her house. When I pulled in the driveway there was a guy on a tractor fixing fencing and another guy with a pick up load of wood that he was going to throw in the basement. When I entered the house there were 2 more guys in the basement catching and stacking wood and Rachael had to run to town to go to an appointment so another friend of Ron's was on his bedside talking to him. I walked in and said hi and everyone was just smiles. Ron had just gotten in from outside his friend Dan Picht pushed him around in the wheel chair so he could get a piece of the beautiful weather and to see what everyone has been doing for them. It is just amazing how giving and kind people are to friends in need. It was very enjoying to see the kindness in every ones face. I left and went back home and Nick and Clint had showed up shortly after I did. Nick was so excited because he shot 4 porcipinines and a rabbit. As he told me the story Clint got on the phone with the fur buyer and asked how much money he would get for his beaver hides. $13.00 a piece. So we loaded them up and headed up to Spring Lake. What a drive. I just love it up North. The boys and I had a great time. We had great conversations. We stopped at Richie's in Marcell and had a beer and Nick got a bit to eat. I called the girls when they got home to see how school was and to let them know that we were out selling the furs, so when I got home Hannah and Shelley has the hamburger ground and ready for spaghetti. Clint made the sauce and it was soooo good. The the phone rang. It was my girlfriend Holly she was crying, her mom was going to the hospital because they think she had a stroke. She need to bring the boys over. I said that is fine. I talked to her this morning and it sounds like they found an aneurysm on her brain. They got to Duluth at 3am so she is going to call me later today. When one thing is getting better it seems like there is something bad right behind it. Please pray for Norma and Holly. Holly needs the Lords strength to help her through this. I will post news as I hear it... God bless

Sometimes the simpliest things are the best.

Yesturday there was no school. I had a list of chores for the kids to do. I was disappointed that not all of them got done. Am I being tooo tough on them. I want them to respect our home and work together as a family. I explain to them that in the worst of situations sometimes that is alls we have, is each other. Clint was frying fish and he already made potatoes so I continued to clean the kitchen and pick up the house. It wasn't that bad. At about 6 Clint said come on lets go for a ride. So we told the kids that we were going to go for a ride together. After them complaining about us leaving we just left. It was tough on both of us but we never do that. So when I got home I explained to them how important it was for dad and I to have some alone time and talk about things that should not concern them. We (clint and I) had a great time. We talked about the important things and Laughed about the silly things. We got home at 8. It was 2 hours of fun. I haven't had that in a long time. I thanked the kids as I tucked them in last night.
I think Clint and I needed to talk and get somethings out that should have been done along time ago. We talked about our kids most of the time. How concerned we are about somethings. It was good to know that we were seeing the same things and that we agreed to how to deal with them..
Deer season is right around the corner. We got the garage all ready this past weekend. We are hoping to get at least 50 deer to process this year. We were going through are past years of doing this and our first year we processed 122 deer. I can't believe we did that many. It is a crazy couple of weeks but it sure helps out the pocket book for Christmas...
Well I think I better get to work. God Bless to ALL.....

the weekend is gone

Back to work today. Not feeling so well I think the winterery weather is already gettin me down. I have a sinus infection I think and 2 kids at home sick which I think one is really only sick. My weekend consisted of nothing but work on Saturday and then went home and rested. Sunday I slept until 10:30 wow.... Then went to walmart for the necessities and came home usually I like to make a big meal on sundays but instead I made tater-tot hotdish... nummy. Watched a movie and went to bed and woke up this morning even feeling worst. But I made it to work. Hannah is with her grandpa trapping today and tommorrow. She really enjoys spending time with him. I think Clint feels bad that she doesn't go with him but I think my dad has more patients... He never did when I was growing up. I think it comes with age. My dad does more things with my kids than he ever did with me growing up. Whats up with that? I am very happy that he does things with my kids though. I know they really enjoy it.
I am scared for the winter I think people and getting really crabby already, maybe cause of the Election, weather, no money, etc. I think when winter is really here people are not going to adapt like they usually do. I really hope that the lord watches over everyone to keep them from not cracking up. If you know what I mean.

I think of my dear friend Lesley and her family everyday. I pray for her to stay strong. I can not fathem what she is still going through. I think of her as I write this because I know how much she dislikes winter... Mostly just the cold... I pray that the lord keeps her warm this winter with his arms wrapped tightly around her. I am so happy for her that she has found a strong Christian man that is in her life that keeps her faith stronger with him. I just always have wondered why tragedy strikes the nicest people sometimes. I wish it would just wipe out the bad in this world instead. But I guess the Lord gives everyone a chance and forgives them all If they offer there life to him. It sounds pretty simple and really is. I am glad I did. The things that I have done that are so bad, to have the feeling in my heart that he has forgave me for that is amazing. Some people still have never forgave me. But I am thankful he did... may god be with my children tonight and my family and friends. I love them all....

boy oh boy

I haven't wrote for a while. I am leaving work today at 2 to go home and do chores. I am so behind on things. Life really gets carried away at times. Shelley has her last swim meet of the year this sat. She is pretty excited. She has done very well in swimming this year. Hannah could care less about any sport she likes to watch them but not attend them. Nicholas I think will be athletic. I think he is going to be very strong like his dad. Clint has been out of town the last couple days and it definetaly has been different. He hasn't been gone for work in a long time. Nick got a new bed last night so he was pretty excited. I really want to do the girls next but I am going to control my self with the spending a wait patiently. Maybe we will have a good deer processing season. I think Nick was first because I still sleep with him every night until he falls asleep, So I think I was looking for some extra room also. People think that is bad to do but I think that is my time with him. Soon enough he will be gone out on his own and blah blah. I still sleep with my husband every night but not until after nick falls asleep. I think that is why people think it might be bad, but I do go in my room after he falls asleep.
Well winter is definetly here. That is one of my chores when I get home is to clean out the ashes in the wood stove. So I can get a fire going. It is actually a beautiful fall day today. Well I am really blabbing instead of Blogging today. So I will try again another time. God bless to all who walks in his path.

from a wonderful friend

I just read your blog for Saturday. So I had to go read about Russell, how sad. I want to give you something, I have never shared this with anyone before and you can certainly pass it on if you would like. I wrote this many years ago and it just seems to fit: On this world that spins so fast, we can hope all good things will last.But the reality that we all know, to often we must all let go.Push past the pain and loneliness, block out that throbbing in our chests.Hold our heads ever so high, fight the tears and try not to cry.Walk straight and proud like nothings wrong, and show the world that we are strong.But if for one single day, I could take some things away.I'd take back your hurting and loneliness, and mend the heart within your chest.I would never let you wonder why, and I'd wipe each tear that you did cry.There are so many answers we will never know, like why it hurts so bad when we must let go.All to often the "good things" in life must end, and I'm sorry for the pain it has caused you, my friend. BillieJO

Thank you BillieJo,
I am at home today with a migraine and I just thought I would check my mail,
I am hurting in the head from all the conbfusion that is out in this wonderful world today. I think so much and I worry so much. I think that is why my head hurts today.

Why do people lie? Are they trying to get attention that they never had or is it becasue they had always had it and are addicted too it. There are so many people hurting today and why would anyone want to make them out to be worse off then anyone else. I am sick tod.ay and I can't stand it. I took my medication Imatrex so that I start to feel better because I don't like to feel bad. I don't understand why anyone would want to feel bad... The risks are so high for someone who lies.. I teach my children to not beafraid to tell the truth. Is lieing a disease? I think it is.... I am leaving it at that I am going to go lay down and let me medicine work so i can be normal again because i like being normal and feeling good....
oh I finished the book grace this weekend and pasted it on to a friend I loved it.....

MY HEART IS HURTING

I just read my friends blog and my heart just hurts for little Russell. I can hardly even think of anything to write about. I am going to have to come back later to this blog when I get my thoughts out on what to say about this. I am just really sad for him and the rest of the family.

a day to be proud..

Well last night I was proud of my kids, the night before Hannah had found a $300 zune music device on the bus and brought it home. All the kids were fighting over it. Then I stepped in and said why are you fighting over something that is not any of yours. I explained to Hannah that she had to return it to the bus driver so that he can find who it belongs too. She was upset and said well mom someone took my nintendo ds. I explained, but wouldn't it have been nice to of had that person be honest and return it to the bus driver? She said yes. Now Nick was another story he actually cried all night and was mad at me because he thought he could keep it because he has never had a music thing... Well I was very impatient and disappointed that he didn't understand. He is 9.. So after I calmed down I went in to his room where he was crying and I explained the rights again. I think he understood but was still upset. When my husband got home he new there was something wrong with me and I made it short and sweet and he said that is the right thing to doo. I took a deep breath gave him a hung and said I am going to bed. I tossed and turned all night with anger and disappointment. I know that kids have so many things these days and I can understand where Hannah was pulling herself in the direction of taking it because something has been taken from her. But by my guidance I think she realized and understands that she is a great honest person by doing what she did.



The next morning Nick was still angry, I was loud and annoying in the morning trying to be happy and shouting "rise and shine and give god your glory glory" He glared at me with annoyance but he smiled. It is very difficult to get our children in the right direction but If we don't they will become followers of the devil. It is our responsibility to guide them in the path that the Lord choices.



I pray for the Lord to protect my children and guide them to become honest and good people... Especially of theses times of trial for them.

WHY DO ACCIDENTS HAPPEN AND WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ALL OF US

Hello everyone I guess this is some place where i can layout my thoughts and feelings. I am excited to do that. I am not sure how many people will read this but I guess I just am doing it for myself and would like others to input or advice or just listen. It has been a crazy few months in the life of some very close friends of mine. A longtime friend of mine lost her 2 year child from a terrible accident, also my cousins husband was in a serious accident. So why I am starting this is to find some soul searching and also my first question in this blog is WHY DO ACCIDENTS HAPPEN?Is God telling us something, to have so many accidents happen at once? Is the world coming closer to an end and that he wants us to beaware of our Christianity???? The questions I am asking everyday is why he chooses the ones he does? We are all his children. There is a song on a local country station that says "We all want to go to heaven But not right now". Something like that. That is a very good statement. I know everyone I ask says that they are going to go to heaven. My children believe that and so do I. I want to meet my Lord and My Savior because maybe he is the one that can answer these questions I have. I read the Bible and that helps me with some of the questions I have. With the way our economy is today everyone is cautious and concerned of where we will all be financially and what will life be like for our children, will we hit a depression? Well I really do hope that we do. I know that sounds harsh but I think that is the only way we will get people in this world to really realize how well life really was for so many. I really want my children to realize that you have to work for things that you want you, shouldn't just put them on a credit card. When my husband and I started dating back in 1993 we had life made. So we thought. My husband was working construction and making $10.00 an hour and working hard, I was a nursing assistant making about $7.50 an hour. He baught a new boat, I think I had every new piece of clothing that the mall had shipped in. Then I was blessed with becoming pregnant so we found a piece of land for contract for deed and baught a used trailer house and moved in. I had a baby girl Hannah Renee, I work now at Avco financial services, we had a home and daycare and a rude awakening. But we still felt we had life made. I was crying in bed before I had Hannah and explained to my husband that I feel like I am such a sinner and looser because I got pregnant before we were married or for that matter engaged. So my husband ran down town and baught me a wedding set with his credit card and proposed to me that night. That is just another example of we had no money but man did we have credit. Every day I went to work I missed Hannah so much, I would always seem to need something at Wal-Mart, you know diapers, oh yeah and a new outfit for Hannah. So I would pull out that plastic card and purchase whatever I wanted. I would get my statement and look around and have nothing to show for my spending. The diapers were used and Oh yeah the outfit was ruined because hannah trew up on them and stained the new outfit. And guess what else I only sent ff the minimun payment because that is alls I had. This continued in our lives fo years. What I guess I am trying to say is that If there was a depression It would benifit us all. Ourselves and our children. We would all get back to the basics of our lives that our grandparents lived, sitting down at supper time as a family, talking about each others days. Enjoying the kill that dad got in the woods for dinner and thanking him for that and thanking God for providing us the wildlife. Listening to your family laugh together. Playing a game of catch outside with them, Instead of running all over to pick up kids here and there and never seeing them enjoying the sport until maybe a game and that is if you can make it there. Having the closens of family life. Having mom and dads come over for dinner, or gathering for a game of cards and listening to the radio, reading a book together with your kids. I have always said I was old fashioned. I proved that wrong when I went on shopping sprees and took out the plastic to pay for things that I really did not need. Then refinancing because you can't aford them. In the olden days or Depression days you did not get those luciours you didn't get anything until you had your money saved and then when you did get it man you took care of it and when it was old it was still like brand new.... Maybe all of this that I am sharing is all about why there are so many accidents that are happening.. Maybe we are to wake up and see that light that has been given to us by our Lord and Savior.. Maybe he is saving the young and bring them home to him now because we are all causing caotis here on his earth. Maybe he is teaching us to be thankful for what we have. When we have to struggle it makes us stronger people. I will continue on these thoughts again but for right now I need to go. peace and love to all
Labels: Why do things happen and Where are we headed?